This summer I worked on a diet and fitness program based on Intermittent Fasting. It was a huge change from my regular habits. Usually I eat as a transitional activity. Come home from a stressful doctor appointment? Grab a snack. Finish the dishes and the next thing to do is clean the aviary? Get something to eat to “fortify” myself. Time to edit the newsletter? Definitely gotta eat something first. The responsibility I’m anxious about can’t nag at me if I’m eating something.

The way I got around this habit was to WRITE ABOUT how I was feeling during those times. I called it my “Journal of Whining” and I filled 5 spiral bound notebooks this summer.

Yesterday I drove to HCC by myself for the first time. I knew I was going to be terrified. Previously I had made the trip with my son riding shotgun, and talking to him took my mind off the fear. Yesterday I had the brilliant idea to bring my digital recorder along with me, and spend the whole trip narrating how I felt at any given time. “I’m scared. I’m sooooo scared. I have to pee. Can I just turn around and go home? Oh sh-t I nearly missed that stop sign”.

It worked quite well — my own narration was so over-the-top that I cracked myself up. And “look out for the speed bump” is useful self-talk.

This led to another idea. My plan is to have a chunk of composing work done every two weeks. (That’s why this blog now has 9 pages — one for each 2-week period this semester.) My brilliant idea was to make a short video every 2 weeks talking about what I had accomplished during that period of time. Narrate my own creative process! I got very excited about this and wrote a script for episode 1, and sketched out a script for episode 2.

For  some reason, being meta about this — not just composing, but talking about the process of composing — was helpful to my attitude. The thought of spending 2 weeks beating my head against the wall is terrifying. Talking about the process of beating my head against the wall could be hilarious.

I’m also getting excited about the idea of narrating something. I will be starting voice lessons next week. It would be cool to work on my speaking voice as well as my singing voice.

I wish I could sound like this, but there’s only one Emily Reese!